I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
