i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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