Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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