don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
