You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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