Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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