i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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