my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I know her cup size but not her name....
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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