unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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