So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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