Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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