Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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