He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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