My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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