It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
