i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
