You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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