Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
