Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
