Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
