just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
There's even glitter on my cock...
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