what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
