he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
