apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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