id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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