nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I have aggressive nipples.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
