somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
