maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
