Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
