All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize