there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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