Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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