BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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