Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
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