Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
