Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize