i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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