U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
