These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
You need a sexual gate keeper
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
