So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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