Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
