the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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