I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
