I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
