i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Sorry about my life...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
