omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
