Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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