I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
