Umm I'm too high to move.
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
