can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Randomize
